The Struggles of Life

I wish I could honestly say that the reason I haven't posted in three weeks is because of my oldest daughter's college graduation, or driving to pick up my youngest daughter from college, or getting the cabins ready for both of their returns home, or...... .  But that would not be completely truthful.  The other reason is that I let a family disagreement fester until it created separation in our relationship, and that turned to silence, and that led to a feeling of emptiness.  Then I went into coping mode. Sure, I functioned, and said the right things, but inside there was nothingness.  No joy, no peace, no insights when reading scripture, no closeness in prayer, and very little progress in any area of life.

I write this only out of obligation.  If I was only writing a private journal, I would stop and pick it up when things in life were 'good' again.  But I've committed to keeping a public record (sorry for the discouraging account of my results!) until either I'm certain that the fully engaged life I see in the Bible isn't possible in today's society, or I start consistently living what I believe.  So, I'll seek to find the Path again.  I've begun to make amends with the person I had the conflict with, and hopefully / prayerfully, there will be oneness in that relationship again...soon. Maybe, if I keep up this blog better, I will have the courage to post in the midst of problems, instead of when I start to 'right the ship'.

Plan:  Read over my early posts where the path in life seemed so clear.  Pray that the Holy Spirit shows me how I could have turned the conflict into a blessing early in the process.  Ask the other person in the conflict to do the same. (Hey, I believe that one came from the Holy Spirit since it just popped into my mind.)  Get together with them and see how we can implement what we've learned, and get in agreement of how to handle future situations before they fester and become conflict.

OK, here's committing to a new post on this plan by Sunday.

Failure It Is

This will be a short post.  I promised to give weekly updates on my attempt to live a more disciplined life, and any changes in life that appear to come from it.  I set my goal of spending no more than 15 minutes each day on social media / surfing the internet.  I must report that my attempt has only been that, an attempt.  I really had no idea how much time I spent / wasted.

My plan has been useful.  I have been made aware of how I'm spending my time.  I have prayed much more than usual. (I haven't started any new good works though.) And even though I failed, I'm encouraged to keep moving towards the goal.  I'm even finding that I have less desire for information!

So, there it is, confession...they say it is good for the soul...we shall see!